Wow...did it take me a LONG TIME to figure out what this password was!!
We're back. The winter break turned into a revolving door of illnesses, personal and professional commitments, and overall MOMMING. I have very limited free time as my full attention is consumed by pest control (not bees!) and parenting (butt and nose wiping, mainly).
But we didn't really go anywhere. We've been helping with funding requests, outreach support and other fun projects. The latest of which has been the "plant kindness" initiative. We've been setting up tables of free potted plants and bracelets as a way for people to gift something kind OR do something kind for themselves. There will be one at the Lisbon Library and then another one coming up at J. Plum.
I wanted to take a minute and share a CliffsNotes (vintage!) version of my journey to being alcohol free and how I shifted my energy into prioritizing my mental health.
When my son was 8, he told me one night that he didn't like how I was acting about something. He couldn't connect the dots between the alcohol and the action, but he was able to vocalize his discomfort with my attitude. I'm a loud, opinionated and expressive person in my normal state, but when you add alcohol to that fire, I also get verbally mean. I was strictly a wine or hard seltzer drinker - which is sometimes minimized in my corner of the world, but it was a problem nonetheless. Sometimes a gin and tonic or margarita, but normally just wine. I fell into Mommy Wine Culture. Drinking because your kids are stressing you out? Caroline, really? The therapy they'll need....
So I heard his feedback and recognized that my mood has been all over the place, and I took accountability for my chaos. I called my Dr and we discussed a generalized mood disorder and he told me not to mix my new prescription with alcohol and to come back in one month. No problem!
False.
I made it a 2 weeks and started drinking again. My mood was improving but I missed cocktail time.
I felt terrible and figured it was the prescription, so I stopped taking them altogether. (If you're like "WHAT?" trust me, it makes me cringe as well). The month came to a close and I went back to the Dr and told him I didn't like them because they made me feel terrible and I "couldn't even drink wine". We made direct eye contact and I just knew. The last sip of alcohol I will have in this life is the last sip I took on May 13, 2021! I stopped cold turkey with my Dr.'s blessing, but I 100% recommend calling your doctor first. Even if you're "just" a wine drinker.
(my son and I have done all the therapy and everyone is ok at best and everything is still insane, but it's fine!!)
The last three years of being alcohol free have been spent dedicating quite a bit of time to my mental health via talk therapy, medication management and a deep dive into my brain with a new psychiatrist. With these tools we've been able to diagnose, medicate and manage and I've really had to make a big commitment to myself and my kids & poor sweet baby Tom to stay the course. I've found in the last year, not drinking has become a lot more popular. A lot more restaurants are mocktail pioneers now!
Anyway, that's my big push behind this mission - to spread acts of kindness and other supports to anyone in recovery of any kind. We've done a lot so far and I know we are capable of so much more...I just need a minute to update the shop page :) Best friend Jenn and I are doing a collab with our businesses to bring you something FUN!
Photo of the kindness table at the end of my driveway!
Edit to add - we are getting a puppy 🐶
xx - C